We are thrille
d to bring to you the first ever Wordbitches’ Guest Post. Christi Corbett is writer who is snarky, smart and sassy, the perfect fit for this site. She also has six-year-old twins; this isn’t a requirement to post at Wordbitches, though both Leanne and Elena have fraternal twins. Check out Christi’s bio below and be sure to visit her fantastic blog.
When I was young, I pictured the location where writers did their work. It was always some variation of the following:
The recently showered and fully dressed writer pads down a long hallway and opens a door to their own private writing space. Clutching a mug of tea/coffee, the writer sits down at a comfortable chair located behind a highly polished, very organized mahogany desk. There is a wall of books on one wall and a functioning window overlooks an astounding view of a lake, a mountain, or a field of wildflowers.
Selecting a full pen from a drawer, the writer thinks for a long moment and at the precise moment inspiration hits, leans over a clean piece of paper and the words begin to flow.
Then I became a writer. Here is the reality.
On a typical day, when I’ve begged and pleaded for time to write, I can count on a minimum of five interruptions per hour. Last time I reserved a block of time to write I kept track of interruptions for my own amusement.
6:30 AM Hubby wants to know where the flea powder is—dog is scratching
6:41 AM Hubby comes in room for some clothes
7:01 AM Hubby brings me breakfast (OK—this one is great! Love him!)
7:09 AM Powdered, yet still scratching, dog is let into the room
7:25 AM Kids come in to see if I have any bacon left and can they have it
7:36 AM Boy twin comes in for a hug
7:42 AM Hubby needs toilet paper, where are extra rolls kept?
8:08 AM Girl twin needs me to fix her hair
8:25 AM Knock at window reveals family showing ripened tomatoes
8:26 AM Boy twin can’t find toy army men… do I know where they are?
8:50 AM Girl twin wants to weigh herself
9:01 AM Hubby needs jersey to watch upcoming football game
9:17 AM Hubby wants to know if he can pull bread from freezer
And so on.
So, that is a typical block of “writing time” for me. Now, let’s move on to the instruments for said writing.
My computer is ten years old, shuts off at will (usually when I haven’t saved in a while or I’m in the middle of a fantastic run of words), and is located in a peeling wood veneer cabinet that is shoved in the corner of my bedroom. My kids find everything in the cabinet fascinating, so of course things seem to grow legs and disappear. (Six-year-old twins find calculators, screen cleaners, coasters, my drafts, and note cards to be much fun to play with).
Sometimes I don’t use the computer. When inspiration strikes I use anything that is at hand. Some examples:
• Sticky notes (they paste so nicely to the computer monitor, don’t they?)
• Backs of envelopes
• Any kind of paper with a blank space on it anywhere
• You get the drift
As for writing utensils, our pens never have ink in them (my fault since I leave them clicked open all the time), so I’ve had to improvise at times:
• Crayons
• Lipstick
• Dry erase markers
• And my personal favorite—using the tip of an empty pen to gouge the words into the paper. Trust me, if you’ve got a great flow of words coming to you this will work!
It is during these times that I try to remember it all comes down to this: How you write doesn’t matter, as long as you’re writing!
*
I’m so happy to guest host over here at the Wordbitches blog! I found it one day while online doing research (ok, really I was earning my keep as the reining Queen of Procrastination via Twitter but don’t judge) and haven’t missed a day since.
I’m a former television show and commercial writer who ditched it all to stay at home with my twins. Between wrestling diapers and mounds of laundry, I managed to complete my first novel—a historical fiction about a family traveling along the 1843 Oregon Trail. Now I’m getting ready to hop on the query train.
You can find me on my blog at http://christicorbett.wordpress.com or on Twitter @ChristiCorbett
Leanne Shirtliffe (Ironic Mom)
Elena Aitken
Trish Loye Elliott
Great post, Christi! I think many of us can sympathise with your reality. Although the interruptions are not the same, I can certainly relate.
I have notes written in the dark because I got an idea in the middle of the night and couldn’t be bothered to turn on the light. Always fun to decipher the next day.
Oh, and I followed a link from Christi’s own blog, but this looks like a nice place. I’ll be checking it out.
M.,
If you write in the dark then I’m about to make your day
Did you know that there are pens out there with mini flashlights inside? I have two of them on the table next to the bed and when inspiration strikes at night I simply click one on and can see just enough to write, but not enough to wake up the Dear Hubby.
Hmmmm, me thinks I’ll have to have a contest on my blog soon with one of those as the prize!
Christi Corbett
Oh, I think I’m following you already, but if I wasn’t that would be a great incentive! I love contests where you can win stationary!
Ooh, that sounds brilliant. I’m not sure if my cat would be able to keep off it, but it’d be worth a try!
Love the image of you gouging words with an empty pen, LOL! I think your reality is pretty much the norm for a lot of us. Really, it’s a miracle any books get written at all.
Thanks for your post, Christi!
Shari,
Sadly, I’ve gouged words more times than I can count because I NEVER click the pen closed or put the cap on. Even worse, I put those pens back upside-down in the cup so the ink goes to the other end of the pen.
I love your line, “Really, it’s a miracle any books get written at all.”
Christi
Too funny. I tried to gouge today while I waited for the kids at the bus stop. I brought a dead pen.
Christi, you are indeed a great addition to this blog.
You are dedicated and have enough stobborness to succeed in anything you decide to do. It is no surprise to me you are a good writer.
My heart reaches out to all those young moms out there who are shuffling kids, chores, activities for kiddies, car pooling and still have the desire and energy to write.
That you scribble on anything, with or without ink is a testament to your determination. Love the post
Florence,
Yay! I knew my best writing buddy would make it over here!
I think you’re really going to love the Wordbitches blog, they’re funny just like you!
Thanks for all your support,
Christi
Lmao over your post Christi! So freaking true! My sorts of interruptions involve cats needing to be petted and loose horses or braying donkeys rather than children but it’s the same song on a different instrument
I’m with you on the random writing utensils as well. I always tell this story about when we were camping once and my pen ran out ink and no one had anything else and I burned a thin stick and used that to makes notes on what I’d been doing when the pen bugged out.
Wordbitches, you rock and you’ve just found yourself another follower!
A.,
You create the BEST images of what you have going on during the day. I picture a donkey poking it’s head through the window by your computer desk and nosing around for food while you’re trying to write
Burning a stick?! You are AMAZING and a true writer warrior!
Christi
PS. You’re going to LOVE the Wordbitches blog posts.
Y’all are make us blush. More writers = more fun.
Love this! I have used questionable writing methods in the past as well. Never lipstick, though! Haha. But you do what you gotta do, right?
Lydia,
I forgot to put in how dry-erase markers on a mirror works in a pinch.
Thanks so much for stopping by. I’m thinking on my “break” story for your contest. It’s a REALLY embarassing one so it should do well
Christi
I have the opposite problem with pens and paper. I go on shopping sprees at office supply stores when I have a writer’s block which means I am there at least once a week. I try to spend less than $5o on pens. But there are so many to choose from.
Pens. Yes. I love the ones that are $12 /pack of 3. I lose them at a rate of one per day. Not cheap.
ROTFL!! Ok, I chuckled out loud at the inkless pen gouging. Hey, whatever works, right?? Your writing hours sound a lot like mine. I wake up at ungodly hours so I can have my own time instead of catering to the hubby and kids and dog.
I’ve always envisioned the mahogany desk too…. some day …. along with the wildflower covered mountain overlooking the coast ….. *sigh*
Great post, Christi!
PK,
I totally identify with the catering to the hubby, kids and dog. We have a rather demanding cat now too. In fact, when she wants attention she slips through my feet and rumages around under the desk until I pull her out. Then she wants petting and scratching and food.
I’m actually counting the months until my kids are in school full time and I can get some serious writing time in. (They are in Kindergarten now but it’s only 2.5 hours per day, plus with all the days off for budget cuts it hasn’t really been helpful)
Thanks so much for checking out my guest post!
Christi
Marianne,
I love pens, but my problem is I lose the really nice ones so I’m stuck with a bunch of Bic’s and ones I pick up free at home shows. In fact, you’ve just jogged my memory that I took my new pen to the grocery store over the weekend and now I don’t know where it went. Sadly, it’s probably in the bottom of a grocery bag.
I have the same problem with sunglasses too. I’ve never spent more than $8 on a pair because I ALWAYS lose them or sit on them within a month. Pathetic.
Now I’m off to snoop around your blog
Christi
I found the pen a few hours after I wrote this…it was in the bottom of a “doggie bag” of food we took home from a restaurant.
I seriously don’t understand myself sometimes
Christi
I am thinking of making a beaded necklace/pen holder to match my beaded eye glass necklace thingy all in the color of Metamucil
Your hubby sounds like a great guy! ….oh that’s right I’m the hubby!
Everyone…I am proud to introduce THE HUBBY!
Yep, he’s the one who keeps it all together so I can spend time with my imaginary friends! (And he brings me coffee in bed each and every morning)
He’s a superstar!
Christi
I’d say he’s a keeper. Definitely.
GREAT job. Loved your morning interruptions…LOL.
Tracey,
So sad to say I didn’t exaggerate at all
.
Thanks for stopping by. I am closer to getting my Kindle so I can check out all your books!
Christi
Funny post, Christie. I also admired A. Grey’s burnt stick technique and Marianne’s pen budget! As Shari commented, it *is* a miracle anything gets written, with all this mayhem.
Monica,
It really is amazing huh? I think we all just have learned to write in spite of the chaos
Christi
LOVE IT. And … so true … snarky, smart, and sasssy.
Margo,
You’ll love the Wordbitches blog so be sure to bookmark it and come back often. They are really funny and have GREAT posts!
Christi
“Writing is a way of talking without being interrupted.” Jules Renard
I saw this quote on twitter today @AdvicetoWriters and laughed because it’s the opposite of what we’re all saying. But in a perfect world, it’s true…
Monica,
I can see why you laughed at that quote…it totally doesn’t take into account all the revisions, backspaces, and self-doubt that we all have while writing. (Oh wait, that might just be me
)
*scrambles off to Twitter to follow @advicetowriters*
Christi
I’ve been following @AdvicetoWriters for a while now. They are awesome!
No, definitely not just you!
Christi, May I just add you’re fabulous! The Wordbitches salute you, my friend.
It’s been such a great day over here with the Wordbitches so I must thank all of YOU for letting me play!
Christi
Great post! I must admit, I had the same idea as you did when I started writing. My first writing space was, no joke, a walk in closet that was 4 ft x 5 ft. I managed to fit in a desk, a chair and a thin dvd holder stand became a bookshelf. I couldn’t close the door, but I loved the fact that it was mine.
As for the interruptions, I must admit, I don’t run into too many… mostly because I don’t have kids. My hubby tries to leave all questions until I leave my lair. He is a great husband!
The fact that you get to call it a “lair”, and that your hubby leaves you alone leads me to believe you probably get lots of stuff done in one sitting. I’m wondering if you managed to sneak in a tv, mini-fridge, and a window yet? (Leave it to me to come up with distractions for you
)
Christi
Christi,
thank you so much for stopping by the blog today! What a great post! I have ALWAYS wanted a roll top desk. And I have these great dreams of writing one day with a quill and ink. Ya…I know.
I’m lucky enough to have my own office writing space (yippee for fabulous husbands!) BUT if summer ever decides to make an appearance, I’ll be taking my laptop outside. Best writing space ever.
Thanks again for popping in!
Rolltop desks are BEAUTIFUL, and they hide everything so nicely when they are closed.
I’m stuck writing in my peeling veneer cabinet since I don’t have a laptop. Maybe that could solve my interupption dilema…something I really need to rectify because here’s the disruptions I’ve had while writing this comment to you. (Sadly, there is no exaggeration going on, this really is my life)
1. Boy twin ran out of toilet paper and needed more. (Because the new cat decided to pull it all off the roll and then sleep in the pile)
2. Both twins wanted to know why there was a popcorn bag on the counter in the kitchen. As in, who dared to make popcorn and not share it with them?!
3. I was introduced to girl twin’s stuffed turtle, “Big Shell”
4. Boy twin came in with plastic bow and arrow in hand and gave mini lecture on Indians.
5. Seconds later I had to remind boy twin “Remember not to shoot your bow and arrow when your sister or the cat are are in the way”
6. LESS THAN THIRTY SECONDS AFTER #5 I had to take away the bow and arrow “until after school, or maybe earlier if you’re good”. He upped the stakes by rummaging around and finding his plastic spear.
*It should be noted that I was against this plastic bow/arrow/weapons kit when the dear hubby purchased it.
And in summary, all of the above is why I try not to even turn on the computer while the twins are home
I’m making an exception for the Wordbitches!
Christi
Great to find you here, Christi. I think we’ve all dreamt of *the* perfect writing space and it’s always something other than what we have. I have an office all to myself (with a window overlooking the woods, too) but where do I do most of my writing? With my laptop in the family room, or on the back deck in the summer. And most interruptions are of my own making… you know the kind: snacks beckoning, Twitter and the Internet calling my name, and in the right season weeds begging to be pulled, or birdfeeders in dire need of refilling, etc. But it seems that when we really, really want to write, nothing stops us. ::going out now to buy a new pen, just in case…::
Carol,
Thank you SO MUCH for stopping by and commenting.
I’m glad to see I’m not the only one fighting through disruptions. I hadn’t thought how a window could actually hinder a writer because it allows you to look upon all your “to do’s” outside. I’m liking how everyone is saying a laptop helps them go anywhere, I better start saving my pennies!
Christi
I love this post! And you forgot to include eyeliner in your list of writing utensils – at least that’s one of my favorites. The chronicle of your typical morning sounds VERY much like my own life – only I don’t try to write under those conditions. I have to get out of the house and away from the kids to write. Today I sat in a coffee shop all day and got SO much done. Reading this post makes me want to find a quiet place for you to write OUTSIDE of the home!
Meghan,
Thanks so much for stopping by and checking out my post. I’m so glad to see you over here!
When I write I’m chained to the junky cupboard that hold our desktop computer, but am saving my pennies for a laptop. Unfortunately it looks like I’ll be saving for about two years until we can afford such a splurge. But, the hubby is great because about once every two months he’ll take the twins out of the house for the entire day…like 8am to 6pm! Those days are so quiet and I get so much done.
Thanks again for visiting over at the Wordbitches,
Christi